What nice boobies!
Every so often, I find myself in the midst of a Saturday Night Live skit. First of all, I present you with this photographic proof that this story is not at all contrived. There really IS a giant watermelon hanging on the ceiling in the restaurant where we dined last night:
So, the restaurant isn’t very crowded, but some woman came in who was… um… QUITE surgically enhanced. I’m not even sure how she was able to stand upright. I have literally NEVER seen a worse boob job in my life.
About two seconds after this woman walked in, and all the adults at the table were exchanging silent “Oh my God, what in the HELL?” looks at each other, my four year old nephew says (at maximum volume,) “Look at the MELON!”
Every adult immediately broke into laughter. And he wasn’t through… he KEPT talking about how BIG the melon was…
So my mother decided to change the subject. However, she chose to point out… the restaurant’s collection of GLOBES. We laughed until our food arrived.
My sister, my nephew and the globes
Happy Sunday.
the weekend
Thank GOODNESS it’s the weekend. I am full or the Christmas spirit, because my sister and her sons are here. Yep, I’m full-time Uncle Tim this weekend, and I love it!
The only major problem has been the fact that my microwave is on the fritz. The drawback to the microwave above the range (the ONLY one as far as I’m concerned) is that you can’t just go buy another one to replace it. I think I”ll have to spring for a repairman to make things better. In the meantime, we eat out. (I know this shocks NONE of my friends, but the only kind of eating I can do at home is sandwiches, microwave, or take-out.)
It’s a good thing I’m such a fan of Sesame Street… since my nephews have the Sesame Street Christmas CD. You haven’t LIVED until you’ve heard The Count sing All I want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth It’s really cute.
In honor of their visit, I put a picture of Bert and Ernie (America’s Muppet Gay Couple) in Santa hats on my cell phone. Also, I ripped “C is for Cookie” to be my ringtone. My nephews think I’m the coolest fat man around. You know why? Because I am.
How I spent my summer vacation
So the Holidalies thing is already kicking my behind, and it’s what, day three? The problem is that I haven’t been writing much, so I’m out of practice. That explains my posting since I’ve been back. It’s bad, I know, and I can promise it’ll get better or I’ll stop subjecting you to it.
I have things that have happened in my life, but nothing I’m willing to write about in such a public forum, which is strange, because I used to LOVE writing about anything I wanted to. Strange, huh?
So I thought I’d catch everyone up a bit with my comings and goings, and let everyone know what I’ve been up to. Although last year was boring, so I didn’t do much. I’m in a “low cash flow cycle” which is a nice way of saying that I’m spending every dime I make on bills, and there’s not much “fun” money left. This distresses me, but life is full of such ups and downs, so you simply cope, and hope for a better year next year.
The most significant thing to happen to me is that I dated Joseph. Note the past tense? Yeah. He’s very cute, sweet, loving, and I simply could NOT afford him. As irresponsible as *I* am with money, he’s 10X worse, and is part of the reason for the cash flow problems this year. Three months with him, three months to catch up, and suddenly, it’ s fall. Who knew?
We have new leadership at work. In a two week period, we lost our Clinical Director, Finance Director and Executive Director. The president of the Board of Directors had to come on-board and run the place while we regrouped. This caused change. Big change. In the process, my job is becoming something quite different than it was just a few months ago, and I’m adjusting. I know this stuff happens all the time in the corporate world, but I’m not used to things like that.
Things are good otherwise. My dogs still make me happy, my home still makes me happy, my car still runs (but doesn’t make me happy… that car was a mistake) and I’m THINKING of re-doing the bathrooms in my house this year. Or I may move out and find a new adventure. The point is, life still doesn’t suck (not much) and I’m young(ish) and able to go or do what I want. I have options. Right?
Next time, I promise not to whine so much.